NARM Training Institute

In the webinar, NARM Master Therapist, Sherri Sharkins and Dr. Laurence Heller define abandonment anxiety and depression and discuss the concept of self-betrayal in the context of NARM. They emphasize that self-betrayal is an ongoing dynamic, not just a past event, and it often stems from the core dilemma of choosing between authentic self-expression and maintaining relationships. The discussion highlights how self-betrayal is linked to various survival styles, shame, self-hatred, and self-rejection. They speak specifically about abandonment anxiety in those individuals who struggle with Borderline Personality Disorder and how it relates to the process of separation/individuation.

The conversation then addresses the relationship between self-betrayal and the body, noting that distorted self-identifications are held in the body as tension or collapse. They explore how the strategies of the survival styles get in the way of genuine connection and how the concept of agency supports addressing self-betrayal by recognizing individual participation in these dynamics.